I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
where am i from again
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
