He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
