Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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