yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
