ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize
