he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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