Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
