If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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