So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I would ride that face into the sunset
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
