just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
