is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
