We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
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