He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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