so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
The convent might be a nice break from real life
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
