I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
