Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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