If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
