toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
