Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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