Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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