You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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