you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
