i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
