I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
