So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
