So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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