Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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