she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
