Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
