so explain again why im purple
no
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Randomize
