Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
