bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
