Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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