the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
As shirtless as possible
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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