omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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