i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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