these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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