he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Randomize
