Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
We're too hungover to prance.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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