I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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