Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Randomize
