So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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