I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
