I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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