I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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