We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
