if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Randomize
