Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
