Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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