She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
This house was built for laser tag.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
